Of course i was also wearing white for appropriate holiday colors c;
Oh!
Oh my. Oh my. Oh my.
men:
i don’t hate you and you know that so please don’t even say it. we don’t need to go down that road. i have listened to too many of your stories, stared into too many of your eyes, i have sucked too many dicks and loved it, learned too much wisdom and gained too much friendship to write men off. if i hated you i would just say fuck it. there’s no way i would spend so much time negotiating all this sexist bullshit.
so now that we’ve got that out of the way and you know that i’m coming from a place of love, i have to say this.
you can face yourself and you don’t have to be ashamed. it takes more courage and more strength to say no to a power that comes from domination and humiliation than it does to take part in it. i know that there is a part of you that remembers the helplessness of being a child. i know you remember being tiny. and i want you to know the importance of that knowledge. it is fundamental wisdom. please stop repressing it. you can be vulnerable and i won’t think of you as less of a man.
you can be a real man and: express affection for your male friends, fuck guys, love eating pussy, take it up the ass, have feelings, like fashion, give a shit about stuff, feel pain, say no, cry, be wrong, learn from your mistakes, grow. you can be a real man and: tell your girlfriend you love her in public, show respect to the women in your life, not laugh at sexist and homophobic jokes, not condone sexual violence. you can be a real man and: desire body types not represented in the media, not have a huge dick, not want to take part in violence.
we have to move away from these narrow, violent, misogynist, homophobic definitions of masculinity and/or manhood. this shit is toxic. we need to let little boys cry and listen to lady gaga if they want to. we need to establish a culture that raises boys to be men who respect and love themselves and who don’t seek power through domination (out of a desperate fear of being dominated and humiliated). i want to tell you guys that i am committed to that culture. i’m not going to make fun of the size of your dick and i’m not going to laugh at you for having feelings and i can think of you as a whole person.
can you do the same for me?
can you unobjectify my body? can you purge yourself of the toxic messages you have learned about womens sexuality? can you handle it if i reject you? can you love me unpossesively? can you fuck me in a way that is more than a validation of your manhood? do you have to put your dick inside me every time we fuck? can we just be friends? can we have a conversation without you staring at my tits? can you take rape seriously, please? we aren’t asking for it. i mean it. and i know you know it’s true.
will you take the time to think about this shit? will you talk to your friends about it? are you committed to a culture where women are treated like human beings? does sexual violence offend and disgust you? if so, how are you comitted to that ethic in your every day life? if not, what are you lying to yourself about? what have you done, condoned, looked away from that you are now afraid of facing? why does acknowledging my humanity terrify you?
we need to move past stereotypes of feminists as man-haters. hating men would be an easy solution. but life’s not that easy. people, human beings, are fucking beautiful and lovable. it is not so easy to write them off. i love human beings and a lot of human beings are men and i want to be able to talk to you, have relationships with you, pass you on the street, change the world together in a way where we can both be full human beings. i am looking at you straight on, level in the eye, and i am asking you, can you recognize my humanity and your own? because i am committed to this. i want us both to be full human beings.
i want to create a culture where violence, sexual violence, disrespect, harassment and humiliating others is seen as the furthest thing from masculine. this will not only liberate women and save countless lives, allow for honest communication between men and women and chip away at homophobia, it will also allow men to stop putting on the facade and just be people. let’s make it happen. it is most definitely within our power to do so.”
oh god yes this now now now everywhere
i want to be “made” to wear one of these
(i put ‘made’ in quotes because i’d actually do it quite willingly)
Mmmm. I’ve got one, but so far it hasn’t worked out with the people I’ve tried it with, alas. Either their mouths were slightly too small for the gag, or it fit uncomfortably against their teeth. The search continues!
